elbales: (Keyboard of LOLZ)
While cleaning up yesterday (and I'm STILL NOT DONE, WAAHH) I came across this quite funny annotated thermometer. Someone originally sent it to me years and years ago and I've been saving it ever since. But now that I've found it online, I can put yet one more bit of paper into recycling. Yay!

Without further ado, I present to you:

How Cold Is It?
An annotated thermometer

+50 / +10
New York tenants turn on the heat
Wisconsinites plant gardens

+40 / +4
Californians shiver uncontrollably
Wisconsinites sunbathe


No, no, don't thank me. It was nothing.
 
elbales: (Cheetah laughing hysterically)
Daniel Craig popsicles: Finally, the meaning of 'sex on a stick'?

In honor of National Ice Cream Week in the UK, Del Monte Superfruit Smoothies has sculpted a limited edition popsicle in the shape of Daniel Craig's nude torso.



OH GOD
DYING OF LULZ
SEND HELP
 
elbales: (ROFL seal)
Dolph Lundgren's wife tied up by robbers... realize who hubby is, and leave.

Armed robbers fled after discovering the home they had broken into belonged to 'tough guy' actor Dolph Lundgren. The masked raiders tied up the star's wife and terrorised her into handing over cash and jewellery by threatening her with knives. But they cut short their raid on the house near Marbella, Spain, after spotting a family photo of the action star and his children in one of the bedrooms.


Their reaction will never not be funny. I mean, not the break-in itself, because I do feel sorry for the poor woman, truly. I'd have been terrified, and I'd have nightmares for weeks. No, the funny part is the robbers going OH SHIT IT'S IVAN DRAGO HE MUST BREAK US GET IN THE CAR.

Winner of the Best Comment So Far Award: "brb putting pix of dolph in my house."

please don't think i'm totally heartless
 
elbales: (Happy cat)
Holy Blog Of Doom, Batman! I just remembered I have not updated this since they let me out! You would not believe how insane my life has become. Seriously!

I am so busy with discovering time doesn't stand still, being distracted by the shiny, just generally being a nuisance to society in general, my day is long and tiring from mid-morning to midnight. I am avoiding recapture. I need a nap.

I solemnly swear I will make more of an effort to blog more often until the nice men in the white coats come back. No, really! I mean it!


. . . Of course this was all built by pop-down menus. Snerk.
 
elbales: (Cheetah laughing hysterically)
H and I saw Wanted.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
aHAhAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

IT'S FLAMING CHEEZ WHIZ IN A CAN.

OF DEATH.

Srsly, that movie was hilarious, stupid, and horrendously nonsensical. But fun.
 
elbales: (Happy cat)
And lo, it was cute and kinda amusing.

I direct your attention specifically to "going to chambr of sekrets, brb" and "Doctor Who: The Last Time Lord (spoilers)." Note specifically what the latter cat is doing. HA.
 
elbales: (ROFL seal)
Awesome spoof of the Bourne Identity films. Absolutely badass. Also hilarious.

Showed on network TV, so it's work safe, though there are lots of bleeped-out words.
 
elbales: (Happy cat)
So I rented HP 1-4 and rewatched them all, because otherwise I knew I'd miss stuff watching OotP. Went and saw it in the theatre yesterday. Good fun. Then I dropped by to return the DVDs. The owner had a movie playing that I didn't recognize.

ME: What's that?

VIDEO SHOP OWNER: The Astronaut Farmer.

ME, obviously out of touch: Wha--?

VIDEO SHOP OWNER: The Astronaut Farmer.

ME: ...He farms astronauts?
 
elbales: (Cheetah laughing hysterically)
Oh those wacky icanhascheezburger guys.

going to chambr of sekrets

lolcats FTW!
 
elbales: (Happy cat)
The hilarious animal stories continue.

Beet Pulp Safety Warning (aka the famous squirrel story)
 
elbales: (OH NOES!Four)
Someone posted a link to this story on the I Has a Sweet Potato entry.

Dogs in Elk in Vegetables
A Halloween Tribute


*iz ded from laugh*
 
elbales: (Dog nose)
I got this from [livejournal.com profile] theta_g, who traces out a long string of people he got it from.

I Has a Sweet Potato.
 
elbales: (Keyboard of LOLZ)
Totally ganked from [livejournal.com profile] chicklet73.

Parting of Wai? No Wai!


That is deeply wrong.
 
elbales: (Happy cat)
He's a gun-slinging native American firefighter who hangs with the wrong crowd. She's a sharp-shooting mutant politician from aristocratic European stock. They fight crime!
 

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